Don't Do Unto Others

                      The Fireplace Records, Chapter 33

Don't Do Unto Others

An acquaintance of mine, a devout Catholic, ends all his email letters with "Love, Arthur."

He has frequently mentioned the Biblical verse "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." (Matthew 22: 38)  Love and loving phrases pepper his conversations. 

My underlying feeling was that these references to "love" were rather insincere and somewhat ungrounded, since I could not understand how two people with radically different opinions about life, religion, and politics could actually "love" one another; socialize and tolerate maybe, but "love," unlikely.  

In my teenage years, I questioned how this verse would apply to people who don't like themselves, hate themself, are ashamed of themself, denigrate themself, or don't love themselves in the slightest, etc. They would seem quite handicapped or incapable of loving their neighbor, insofar as they don't love themselves. On the opposite side, self-respect and self-love has some positive connotations, and can lead to loving others; however, carried to excess it becomes flawed and appears as egotism and narcissism.

I grew up in East Los Angeles, in the Bandini Barrio, for 20 years. It was a low income suburban LA neighborhood. I had a few friends and some good neighbors. However, as with most suburban neighborhoods, I did not know or have any relationships with 96% of my neighbors. I did not love them, nor did I have any opinion or emotion regarding them other than live and let live, let's stay at peace, and mind your own business. "Loving" them was not my concern; and, I had no ill will towards people I did not know. 

I also read, "In everything, do to others what you would have them do to you." (Matthew 7:12) If I wanted hard drugs, does this mean I should give or sell hard drugs to others? If I thought I should be severely punished if I chose not to follow Catholic doctrines, does this give me license to severely punish non-believers? If someone liked perverted sexual play, should they being doing these acts with others? Knowing that others have cheated me, should I cheat others? This moral maxim had some good applications; and, some bad/evil/wrong/destructive applications.  

In high school in 1961, I read Confucian texts.  I came across the Confucian maxim "Don't do to others what you don't want done to you." (Analects, V. 12, VI. 30, 500 BCE)  This ethical/moral/behavioral advice seemed to resonate with me more than the Christian advice. I thought I could apply this maxim more effectively in my daily life with the many people I encountered but did not know, or love. It was a way of caring for others by not harming them. I have tied to follow this practical maxim for six decades.

Comments, Sources, Observations

Gold is malleable, soft, valued, and long lasting; but, limited in other ways.
Rather than a ruler of gold, a flexible cloth tape is more practical.
Rules are useful if properly and intelligently applied.
Acknowledging exceptions to rules is a good rule to apply sometimes. 
The disadvantages loving yourself to excess are numerous.
"Love" is often just another boring cliche, a charming metaphor.
A church sign says "God is Love!" The Devil also loves his work.
Liking, preferring, and loving are cousins, sometimes distant cousins.
Yes, gold is valuable; but of what value is this value?

"Love" is rarely mentioned in Zen Koans; maybe 6 times out of 1,975 Koans. Egoistic-restraint, kindness without reciprocity, control of desires, patience, gentleness, helpfulness, asceticism, toughening, and wisdom are emphasized more.  

Golden Rule - Wikipedia

Ten Reasons Why Self-Love is Bad

Refer to my Cloud Hands Blog Posts on the topic of Koans/Stories. 

Subject Index to 1,975 Zen Buddhist Koans

Zen Buddhist Koans: Indexes, Bibliography, Commentary, Information

The Daodejing by Laozi

Pulling Onions  Over 1,043 One-line Sayings by Mike Garofalo

Chinese Chan Buddhist and Taoist Stories and Koans

The Fireplace Records  By Michael P. Garofalo

Dao De Jing, Laozi, Chapter 24

 Tao Te Ching by Lao Tzu

Chapter 24

"He who stands on tiptoe does not stand (firm);
He who strains his strides does not walk (well);
He who reveals himself is not luminous;
He who justifies himself is not far-famed;
He who boasts of himself is not given credit;
He who prides himself is not chief among men.
These in the eyes of Tao
Are called "the dregs and tumors of Virtue,"
Which are things of disgust.
Therefore the man of Tao spurns them."
-  Translated by Lin Yutang, 1955, Chapter 24

"By standing on tiptoe one cannot keep still.
Astride of one's fellow one cannot progress.
By displaying oneself one does not shine.
By self-approbation one is not esteemed.
In self-praise there is no merit.
He who exalts himself does not stand high.
Such things are to Tao what refuse and excreta are to the body.
They are everywhere detested.
Therefore the man of Tao will not abide with them."
-  Translated by Walter Gorn Old, 1904, Chapter 24

"It is not natural to stand on tiptoe, or being astride one does not walk.
One who displays himself is not bright, or one who asserts himself cannot shine.
A self-approving man has no merit, nor does one who praises himself grow.
The relation of these things (self-display, self-assertion, self-approval) to Tao is the same as offal is to food.
They are excrescences from the system; they are detestable; Tao does not dwell  in them."
-  Translated by Dwight Goddard, 1919, Chapter 24   

"Those who are on tiptoes cannot stand
Those who straddle cannot walk
Those who flaunt themselves are not clear
Those who presume themselves are not distinguished
Those who praise themselves have no merit
Those who boast about themselves do not last
Those with the Tao call such things leftover food or tumors
They despise them
Thus, those who possesses the Tao do not engage in them"
-  Translated by Derek Linn, 2006, Chapter 24  

企者不立.
跨者不行.
自見者不明.
自是者不彰.
自伐者無功.
自矜者不長.
其在道也, 曰餘食贅行.
物或惡之.
故有道者不處.-  Chinese characters, Tao Te Ching, Chapter 24 


ch'i chê pu li.
k'ua chê pu hsing.
tzu chien chê pu ming.
tzu shih chê pu chang.
tzu fa chê wu kung.
tzu ching chê pu ch'ang.
ch'i tsai tao yeh, yüeh yü shih chui hsing.
wu huo wu chih.
ku yu tao chê pu ch'u.
-  Wade-Giles Romanization, Tao Te Ching, Chapter 24 



"Standing tiptoe a man loses balance,
Walking astride he has no pace,
Kindling himself he fails to light,
Acquitting himself he forfeits his hearers,
Admiring himself he does so alone.
Pride has never brought a man greatness
But, according to the way of life,
Brings the ills that make him unfit,
Make him unclean in the eyes of his neighbor,
And a sane man will have none of them."
-  Translated by Witter Bynner, 1944, Chapter 24  


"He who stands on tiptoe is not steady,
He who holds legs stiffly cannot walk.
He who looks at self does not see clearly.
He who asserts himself does not shine.
He who boasts of himself has no merit.
He who glorifies himself shall not endure.
These things are to the Tao like excreta or a hideous tumour to the body.
Therefore he who has Tao must give them no place."
-  Translated by Isabella Mears, 1916, Chapter 24  

"Quien se sostiene de puntillas no permanece mucho tiempo en pie.
Quien da largos pasos no puede ir muy lejos.
Quien quiere brillar
no alcanza la iluminación.
Quien pretende ser alguien
no lo será naturalmente.
Quien se ensalza no merece honores.
Quien se vanagloria
no realiza ninguna obra.
Para los seguidores del Tao, estos excesos son como excrecencias
y restos de basura que a todos repugnan.
Por eso, quien posee el Tao
no se detiene en ellos, sino que los rechaza."
-  Translation from Wikisource, 2013, Capitulo 24  

"Standing on tiptoe, you are unsteady.
Straddle-legged, you cannot go.
If you show yourself, you will not be seen.
If you affirm yourself, you will not shine.
If you boast, you will have no merit.
If you promote yourself, you will have no success.
Those who abide in the Tao call these
Leftover food and wasted action
And all things dislike them.
Therefore the person of the Tao does not act like this."
-  Translated by Charles Muller, 1891, Chapter 24


Is That a Fish in Your Ear?: Translation and the Meaning of Everything  By David Bellos.  New York, Faber and Faber, 2011.  Index, notes, 393 pages.  ISBN: 9780865478763. VSCL.  



A typical webpage created by Mike Garofalo for each one of the 81 Chapters (Verses, Sections) of the Tao Te Ching (Daodejing) by Lao Tzu (Laozi) includes over 25 different English language translations or interpolations for that Chapter, 5 Spanish language translations for that Chapter, the Chinese characters for that Chapter, the Wade-Giles and Hanyu Pinyin transliterations (Romanization) of the Mandarin Chinese words for that Chapter, and 2 German and 1 French translation of that Chapter.  Each webpage for each one of the 81 Chapters of the Tao Te Ching includes extensive indexing by key words, phrases, and terms for that Chapter in English, Spanish, and the Wade-Giles Romanization.  Each webpage on a Chapter of the Daodejing includes recommended reading in books and websites, a detailed bibliography, some commentary, research leads, translation sources, a Google Translate drop down menu, and other resources for that Chapter.   

Chapter 24, Tao Te Ching by Lao Tzu

Chapter and Thematic Index (Concordance) to the Tao Te Ching by Lao Tzu

English Language Daodejing Translators' Source Index

Spanish Language Daodejing Translators' Source Index

Ripening Peaches: Taoist Studies and Practices

Taoism: A Selected Reading List

One Old Daoist Druid's Final Journey  

Master of the Three Ways

Master of the Three Ways: Reflections of a Chinese Sage on Living a Satisfying Life. 
By Hung Ying-ming.  Translated by William Scott Wilson.  Foreword by Red Pine.  Boston, Shambhala, 2012, 196 pages. Written by Hung Ying-ming in about 605 CE.  

"Master of the Three Ways is perhaps the very finest literary expression of the Unity of the Three Creeds: Confucianism, Ch'an (Zen) Buddhism, and Taoism.  Composed of 357 verses of accessible prose-poetry, it not only expresses the root values of the three traditions while rarely mentioning them by name, but also takes as points of departure the branches of these philosophies as expressed by other Chinese poets and philosophers."  - William Scott Wilson.  

"The disease of blatant desire can be cured,
But the disease of excuse-making is difficult to alleviate.
The obstacles of external affairs and thing can be displaced,
But the obstacles of Reason are difficult to overcome."
#187, p 93

"Title and rank should not be elevated to high.
   Once a high elevation is reached, there is danger.
Ability should not be used to exhaustion.
   Once exhaustion is reached, there is decline.
Moral behavior should not be raised excessively.
  Once excess is reached, there will only come slander and blame."
#137, p. 70

"When your work has come to a standstill
and you can neither advance or retreat,
You should relocate the mentality with which you began.
When your efforts have been realized
and your actions are fulfilled,
You need to look carefully farther down the road."
#30, p. 21

"Do not believe in the one-sided,
nor be cheated by deceivers.
Do not be too self-reliant,
nor make a show of your courage.
Do not, with your own strong points,
expose the shortcomings of others.
Do not, because of your own ineptitude,
despise abilities not your own."
#120, 62

"If a common person ventures to cultivate virtue
     or perform a good deed,
It is just like being a high official, but without rank.
If a man of high rank uselessly indulges in his power
     or markets his position,
He becomes, in the end, only a titled beggar."
#93, p. 51

"Our disposition should be lofty and broad,
But not to the point of be distant and abstracted.
Our thoughts should be detailed and conscientious,
But not to the point of being tedious and nit-picking.
Our tastes should be simple and ascetic,
But not to the point of eccentricity and desiccation.
Our virtue should be strict and clear cut,
But not to the point of vehemence or rage."
#81, p. 45

"In carrying yourself through the world,
Do not try to be overly pure.
     One needs to ingest
     A morsel of disgrace and defacement, too.
In associating with others,
Do not be too scrupulous.
     One needs to embrace
     Both the good and the evil,
     Both the clever and the dull."
#185, p.92