Our Backyard
The Onion of Being
Never stops growing
Layering layers over layers---
Giving us one peel a day
On our life's way

Shoveling Some Compost Crap
By Mike Garofalo
Back in the Spring of 2007, I was working in my large garden
in the Sacramento Valley. I was shoveling and spading compost, sand, straw, and
manure into my clay soil. That got me tp thinking about how gardeners have
fertilized for centuries before commercial phosphate fertilizers. I did some
research in my many home library gardening books, and I searched the Internet
for more information. I learned that the Chinese have been using human and
animal nitrogenous wastes, yes Shit, as one element in their creation of good
compost for forty centuries. I then created an informative webpage on Fertilizer practices, and then
a humorous poem on the subject that I posted to my Cloud Hands Blog in 2007.
So, this poem I will read tonight from 2007 is just
some Old Shit.
However, if you've never heard it before, it's some
fresh New Shit at your door.
This poems title is: Shoveling Some Compost Crap.
Gardeners know all about bull shit, horse shit, and chicken
shit.
They might be lucky shits, dumb shits, crazy shits, or have shit for brains;
but they shovel crappy compost shit for tasty beans anyway.
They know that some nights are colder than shit,
and some days are hotter than shit,
and other days are just plain shitty,
other crappy days get in the way,
but they step in the shit anyway.
Gardeners all throw composted crap
or sling shit, shoot the shit, occasionally catch some shit,
or duck when the shit hits the fan.
Now, I recommend, that You had better give a shit,
and get your shit together;
or you will find yourself in deep shit,
smelling like shit,
treated like shit,
and end up being shit out of luck.
I felt crappy today,
nobody gives a shit anyway;
we all have too damn much crap to do,
plus picking up the shit from our human zoo.
Once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything
else,
and you'll be has happy as a pig in shit;
if you don't know your crap, you'll be told to shit or get off the pot,
told that you don't know the difference between shit and shine'ola,
served shit on a shingle,
get a ripped off by a crappy deal,
told your ideas arn't worth a shit.
If you can't shit or pee
your in deep shit
dying from a shitty disease,
that won't scare the crap out of you.
Damnit! Damnit! Shit!
You can smoke some shit,
drink until your shit faced,
buy some more shit,
feel like shit,
look like shit,
and find yourself in a boat load or mountain of shit.
Crap! You can have too much shit,
not enough shit, the right shit,
the wrong shit,
or a lot of weird shit.
In summary: Shit Happens! Please!
Fertilizer:
Quotes, Sayings, Jokes
Poetry by Mike Garofalo
25 Steps and Beyond
Repost from Febuary 2021:
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"I've made an odd discovery, every time I talk to a savant I feel quite sure that happiness is no longer a possibility. Yet, when I talk with my gardener, I'm convinced of the opposite."
- Bertrand Russell, mathematician and philosopher
How to Live a Good Life: Advice from Wise and Respected Persons
Huineng (638-713 CE) was an hardworking monk who quietly followed all the Temple lifestyle rules. His job was to gather firewood to use in the kitchen or elsewhere at the Temple. He pulled a little cart and gathered sticks, driftwood, wood donations, and downed limbs. He sawed, split up, and cut up dried wood to give to the cooks in the Temple kitchen or others tending fires. He did this humble task well for many years.
Huineng is remembered for emphasizing the power of simple useful work activities as a valid path to enlightenment (e.g., gardening, Temple maintenance, cooking, chores, firewood working, samu = work, transcribing, etc.) Huineng became enlightened while chopping up bamboo. He later became a leading Zen Master featured in many stories.
Also, we all have roles, duties, work, and responsibilities to others and to ourselves. This is an underlying reality.
"The kitchen was a hell of heat. Woks large enough to bathe a child in sat on roaring, wood-burning brick stoves. Young monks fed the insatiable fires, while others stirred the boiling rice. Some chopped vegetables or prepared them for pickling. They were all under the direction of a senior priest, who was known only as "the Old Cook.""
- By Deng Ming Dao;, Chronicles of Tao, p. 166
The Kitchen of a Daoist Temple Monastery in the Huashan Mountains of China, circa 1930's.
Somebody is still chopping wood for a fireplace stove, or providing you with the electricity or gas or coal for you kitchen ovens and stoves and cooking appliances.
Without the fire in the kitchen for cooking we could not survive.
So, who chops the firewood for your kitchen stove?
Comments, Sources
Refer to Cases ??? in Koan Classics. OK. find any?
Refer to my Cloud Hands Blog Posts on the topic of Koans/Mondos/Tests
Pulling Onions Over 1,043 One-line Sayings by Mike Garofalo
Chinese Chan Buddhist and Taoist Stories and Koans
The Fireplace Records By Michael P. Garofalo
The Fireplace Records, Chapter 44
The Dumpling Discourse
It was a hot day in July when Carol and Adolf met in a tea shop in Portland. They sipped iced tea and chatted about Taoism for an hour.
Adolf asked Carol, "What is beyond the Tao?" Carol answered, "Either the Dark Void or preparing hot oatmeal."
Adolf sarcastically replied, "Yunmen is direct, he says '"Dumplings.' You are caught in either/or, dualisms, and straying from the spot!" Carol said "Purported Zen Masters seldom cook."
Adolf raised his right hand, like Gutei, and gave Carol the middle finger. Carol slapped the finger of his right hand.
Adolf got up and went to the toilet. While urinating, like Master Omori Sogen, he was suddenly awakened. While he was away, Carol left for home.
She worked in her home garden. She weeded and watered. She picked two squash. Like the Tao, she grew living beings. She went indoors and cooked some hot oatmeal. She added raisins to the mush. She ate. She smiled. Her dark blue bowl was then empty. She was ordinary and clear mined.
Comments, Sources, Observations, Koans, Poems, Quips:
Omori Sogen, "Introduction to Zen Training" Tuttle, 2001,2020.
"What is talk transcending the Buddhas and Patriarchs?", Yunmen's translated answers "Sesame Cakes", "Rice cakes", "Dumplings."
See BOS 78, ZE 42, ENT 88, WWSF 348, BCR 77
Gutei's One Finger Zen
BCR 19, BOS 84, DSMS 245, GB 30, SOH 21
If the answer can be 'the oak tree in the courtyard,' then the answer can be 'eating oatmeal with raisins.'
Irrelevant answers are a staple spontaniety of Zen tricksters.
Some say nonsensical Zen Koan answers are free and natural poety; however, they are often just bad poetry.
Which finger was the "one finger?"
People are Makers, Imitating the Dao - The Great Maker, Doer, Creator. Sometimes even seeming to go Beyond the Dao.
636 Riddles, Jokes, Witticisms, Humor
Refer to my Cloud Hands Blog Posts on the topic of Koans/Stories.
Subject Index to 1,975 Zen Buddhist Koans
Zen Buddhist Koans: Indexes, Bibliography, Commentary, Information
Pulling Onions Over 1,043 One-line Sayings, Quips, Maxims, Humor
Chinese Chan Buddhist and Taoist Stories and Koans
The Fireplace Records (Blog Version) By Michael P. Garofalo
